January 2011
Happy New Year Girls and Gays
I thought I’d tell you all before I’m too drink to type.
Jan 1st
December 2010
1 tag
Dec 31st
trainjuice asked: What dish/meal that you make would cause me to propose to you ColeCurt?
Dec 31st
trainjuice asked: What dish/meal that you make would cause me to propose to you ColeCurt?
Dec 31st
2 tags
Bad Habits
I’m one of those people who keeps whatever someone makes me.  This includes mixed CDs.  Tonight I was going through and organizing my cds in the spirit of New Years and getting shit done.  I came across one such mixed CD and I can’t remember who gave it to me, but it had songs like “Mustang Sally” and two songs by Creed, one of which I’m fairly sure was a bootlegged...
Dec 31st
1 tag
Dec 31st
Dec 31st
36 notes
Dec 31st
36 notes
Aimee Mann I Need Some New Music
I’m organizing my music collection (remember cds)—because I’m that popular right now—and I found a Christmas Album by Aimee Mann.  How fucking depressed was I one year at Christmas that I was willing to buying this? Sad, sad, sad. 
Dec 31st
One Day Back...
and I already want to give this place the one-fingered wave goodbye.  The glitter, it has faded.
Dec 28th
Dec 24th
Dec 24th
Dec 24th
Dec 24th
Dec 24th
Christmas Sigh
The Big Family Christmas is over and every cell in my body is exhausted. My cousin actually brought someone really nice. He’s a very liberal ex-Marine. After four hours he feels like a member of the family already. It’s weird how some people just fit and others don’t—like my string of uncles. I hope the laws change so I can one day suck at marriage like the rest of my kin.
Dec 24th
Dec 23rd
Dec 23rd
2 tags
Misty Eyed
My mother, who’s just like me when it comes to presents, broke down and told me what she got me for Christmas.  She’s donating money to pay for a room at a soon to be constructed homeless veteran’s shelter in the town where my father died. (For those that don’t know my dad died of alcoholism on the streets, despite my family’s best efforts. Also, he was a veteran of...
Dec 23rd
Anonymous asked: I'm talking about woodythecowboy. He seems super sweet and so do you.
Dec 23rd
Anonymous asked: I'm talking about woodythecowboy. He seems super sweet and so do you.
Dec 23rd
Anonymous asked: Are you single? I think this guy from gawkerdating would be perfect for you.
http://gawker.com/comment/34501232/
Dec 23rd
Anonymous asked: Are you single? I think this guy from gawkerdating would be perfect for you.
http://gawker.com/comment/34501232/
Dec 23rd
2 tags
There Are No Words
So, I tried to think of a witty yet stern/shaming reply to now-married-with-a-kid’s sexting.   DRAFTS: “Do you change your kid’s diapers with those fingers?” “Shouldn’t you be planning how to sneak toys down a chimney, not up someone’s ass?” FINAL MESSAGE: I settled on, “Lose my number.” Wit just opens the door for more assholery...
Dec 23rd
3 tags
OH HOLY GOD
I just got a text message from my ex-sort-of boyfriend, who is now married with a kid.  It was not an appropriate text message for a “straight” married man with a kid to send. I kind of felt ashamed that I still had feelings for him after he got married, but once that baby popped out those feelings went the way of the dodo. Now I kind of feel sad for him, and also horribly, horribly...
Dec 23rd
1 tag
Dec 23rd
STFU Family Member
I’ve been here thirty minutes and my cousin is already annoying the shit out of me. She’s walking around the house in pajamas loudly singing pop songs in her opera singing voice, while wearing a facial mask. My family explains a lot about me.
Dec 23rd
1 tag
Dec 22nd
Homeward Bound
So, I’m heading to the beautiful deserts of West Texas in an hour. I’ll probably check in from time to time on here, as my family is a constant source of amusement and provides me with stories that I just have to share. But, I hope you all have a wonderful holiday season! ALSO, if one of you will be a dear and look up the COTD names and bold them in the comments I’ll be your best...
Dec 22nd
1 tag
Dec 22nd
Dec 22nd
Dec 22nd
2 tags
trainjuice asked: FUN FACT: When I started my tumblr waaaay back in January of aught '10, I was going to call it "Colin Oscopy". Honestburgers. As a play on everyone pronouncing my name wrong. But I'm glad I didn't, because that would be awkward.
Dec 21st
trainjuice asked: FUN FACT: When I started my tumblr waaaay back in January of aught '10, I was going to call it "Colin Oscopy". Honestburgers. As a play on everyone pronouncing my name wrong. But I'm glad I didn't, because that would be awkward.
Dec 21st
SO.PROUD.
Apparently all of those science books I’ve bought my nephew are paying off. He got into an argument with a kid where he defended evolution and made fun of creationism.  He’s seven.
Dec 21st
3 tags
White Elephant Gift
So, as I’ve previously bitched about, my family is doing a White Elephant Gift* swap where there’s a cash limit of $25 dollars for the adults.  *insert dramatic eye rolling here* Somehow me buying everyone gifts already doesn’t exempt me from this new tradition. I’m really not being grinchy here, I’m not expecting an equal number of presents given to presents...
Dec 21st
3 tags
Dec 21st
scarygodmother replied to your post: LOL Gawker I think this would be a great time to break out the banhammer, swing it wildly and indiscriminately, and blame the inevitable chaos on tech problems. File this under: “Things That Would Most Likely Get Me Fired.”  I’m actually not that big of a fan of banning.  Mostly because it always ends up being a pain in the ass. You have...
Dec 20th
LOL Gawker
I love that there are all kinds of technical problems the day they roll out the big solution to GAWERHACKPOCALYPSE 2010. Fuck it, I’m just making jokes on there until the New Year.
Dec 20th
Dec 20th
Dec 20th
1 tag
Dec 20th
Dec 20th
I Really Like MoGlo's DADT Piece
And I want to move half of these comments to #GoFuckYourself or #NoItsStillNotAboutYou. Let’s be honest, Lady Gaga’s contribution to the repeal of DADT was as significant as a fart in a jam jar. Just because you squawked about it a year before it happened doesn’t make it The Lady Gaga Initiative. 
Dec 20th
Black Swan
I just got out of Black Swan, which is amazing.  Darren Aronofsky never really disappoints me, but I thought this film was his best so far.  Natalie Portman was brilliant in it.  I’m not sure why there is so much buzz around Mila Kunis’s performance, but whatever.  I haven’t seen everything yet, but I’m guessing Natalie’s a shoe in for a Golden Globe and probably the...
Dec 20th
WTF Christmas
I just found out we’re doing a White Elephant Christmas for the adults in my family. I’ve already bought and wrapped presents for everyone, including their children, and now I’m getting a 25 dollar gift. Christmas.Stocking.Of.Fire.
Dec 19th
1 tag
hotblondecocktail: Yaaaaay, gay people are now considered good enough to die for their country, just like everyone else!  Let’s see how long it takes for the government to decide it’s okay for gay people live in their country, just like everyone else! OH, come on. Let’s dance!
Dec 18th
1 tag
Dec 18th
DADT OVERTURNED
What a glorious day.  All of those It Gets Better messages are a little bit truer today. Thanks to all of you wonderful people who support our rights. 
Dec 18th
Useful Advice
Don’t argue with your cab driver that his name isn’t Yusuf, because everyone knows that “Yusuf” means “cat.” He’ll just hand you his card that says, “Yusuf” and you’ll feel like an unintentional racist asshole. True facts.
Dec 18th